We’ve all been a victim of them. Dominating the playground or the workplace, even in the social media streets, mean girls are rife. They whisper about you as you turn your head, they form Whatsapp groups and make you the topic of discussion, tearing your character apart with their words.
So how do you deal with them? What’s the secret of getting through life when women who are supposed to understand and guide you want to break you down instead? I have three things for you to remember when going through life while mean girls still walk the streets, and here they are.
- Understand your own identity.
It’s very easy to be side-tracked by the naysayers and begin to question your worth and value. Words may not be sticks and stones, but they definitely can cut you down and make you feel diminished. If you’re like me, some words can leave you in a puddle on the floor trying to recover from their sting. The truth is though, those words are not what define you. Where does you identity lie? Personally, I find my identity in the one who created me, a God who formed and knitted me with care and love. He coded purpose on the inside of me so when I feel depressed about what others may be saying about me, I measure it up to what the Bible says about me, if they aren’t one in the same then the words of others are irrelevant.
- Understand your mission
What is your role or function in your current place? Are you there to please people? Are you there to make as many friends as possible or accomplish a task? Don’t let the overwhelming feeling of being a people pleaser distract you from the goal. If you manage to make connections along the way, it’s a great bonus but sometimes it’s not always possible. Don’t feel pressured to do more than the necessary in order to make everyone happy. As long as you are kind and courteous you are doing enough.
- Remain Unchanged
Finally, never allow outside influences change who you are on the inside. My rule for 2021 is that I will not be changed by how others treat me. I will remain ME. There are things that I am, some of those things are bubbly, joyful and talkative and those things will not change based on how others come at me. I am also full of love and will continue to pour it out even if it isn’t reciprocated, because who I am is loving even if the recipients aren’t. One thing I am not though, is fake. If I feel uneasy about someone, I will never fake my happiness around them, I’d rather remove myself from their presence. So, my favourite piece of advice for dealing with mean girls… BE YOU.
Being loved for who you are is much more fun than trying to fit into a fake mould and keeping up an unattainable appearance to please people. So be YOU! Mean girls will come in all stages of our lives, but a strong character must choose not to be shaken.
Love and Bubble Joy