As I watched you walk to your classroom, unassisted, not even turning back to check if I was watching, I think back to the beginning of the year. It started off with tears and heartache at every school drop-off, calls to the teacher throughout the day to check up if you managed to settle down and find a friend. My heart broke every morning having to leave you in tears but delighted in your smile at the pick-up line.
Today I am painfully and proudly aware of how much you have grown. You no longer need to be carried into your orange classroom; you bravely lead the way. I’ve watched you gain independence little by little throughout the year. You brush your teeth on your own, you even insist on dressing yourself. Whilst I beam with pride as you develop, my heart aches for you to remain little and need me a little more.
Motherhood is strange you see, we can’t wait to get our freedom back, somedays all we want is for kids to put themselves to bed so we can have a little silence and alone time. Today, I’m sadly conscious of the fact that those moments are around the corner. I know there are many years ahead till I have tweens on my hand, but I see the changes coming by so fast that I know I need to soak in every moment.
So, I’ll watch you disappear as you turn the corridor. I’ll read you an extra story before bedtime. I’ll hug you a little longer when you’re sad. I’ll bake with you on a weekday and play dress up and Barbies whenever you want.
This quote on the motherhood by Gretchen Rubin is the truest quote I’ve come across,
My little children grow slow. Mama needs to capture all these moments.